Reproductive Equality

By Vernie Lynn DeMille

They tell me I will not be completely free

Until my womb can match a man in equality.

 

I should be free to find pleasure

And walk away,

 

Make promises with lies

And refuse to pay

 

The debt I leave for taking time,

Making something that people call love

With no emotion, 

No protection,

No thought,

No notion

Of futures, people, or plans.

 

Just like a man.

I must have the right

To play then run

From what cannot now be undone

Without the cost of tears and pain,

I must not look back

Nor regret

Nor feel shame,

Nor wish for anything

Other than this:

That I can work

Or learn,

Or fight,

Or move

Without the burden

Of what passed for love.

 

Just like a man,

I should take what I want,

Run for my goal

With ruthless drive

Be focused, be fearless

 

But never whole.

 

For what fills my arms

Once made my belly round

And she was in my heart

Before hers made a sound.

And a man may walk away from this,

No umbilical cord to tie him down

And wrap him in bonds

Of blood and birth.

He can roam his fill

Climb peaks, sail seas,

Walk away from her, 

Walk away from me.

 

But we remain.

And I cannot pretend

Though I’m told I should

That to be like a man

In this way is good.

 

To pick the worst of man’s weakness to define my goal

And call it equality?

To give up what is mine

And be like him,

Who can take his leave…

 

No, I refuse to believe that I will be free

Or equal

When I can also neglect,

Or treat with casualness 

What I desire to protect.

This is the cost of what equality means,

That I give up my hopes, my wishes and dreams

For her.

In order to be 

Like him.

 

Just like a man.

 

To color his barrier to success and wealth

With the threat of death.

To throw down his worst and call it my best.

 

To claim equal if I 

Step down where he stands.

Beneath me where he lives,

Outside of Eden,

That lone, cold man.

 

And I hold this fruit

And I know this truth

We’ll never be equal if this is the price,

This life for a life.

Because I am stronger than a man

Who is afraid to stay.

I am bigger than a man

Who cannot make space

For new life to grow, to begin

To expand.

 

I am truly a woman,

And equal be damned,

If the cost is my becoming

 

Just like a man.

 

July 7, 2019